Hello (adele style),

‘Hello from the other side
I must’ve called a thousand times’

Sarcasm doesn’t help. You never get it.

Anger doesn’t help coz you just clear your throat and ask me the same question for the 50th time.

Your responses start from a recorded message … to a very long wait listening to a very annoying update of all that you offer other than a quick response … to a very slowwwww and sleepy voice asking how you may help me.

Then the rapid-fire questions begin at a speed that questions the existence of speed and defies all speeds of comprehension. You want my DOB, my address, my pan card number, my phone number, my this number and my that number by which time i have emptied out my wallet desperately trying to feed you all the information you need while my voice rises in decibel levels and i think i may get a stroke. You may very well ask me to be patient but its 20 mins since i dialled the number and i haven’t even got to the point where my complaint can be registered. And i know that the actual navigation of comprehension, language and articulation will challenge every last cell in my being.

22.5 mins after my dialling the number …

My nerves are shot. My eyes are glazed. My hands are shaking. My phone is lying shattered on the living room floor and there is an ungainly dent in the wall.

The call dropped just as you asked me the nature of my call. It DROPPED!!

Sob!

I can’t do this again.

I give up.

An irate, helpless and weary caller.

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